Bella, my sweetest girl. 1 week from today, it will have been 1 year since you left this world. It feels like both yesterday and a lifetime ago, though I miss you today just as much as ever. You were and will always be my best friend.

It still doesn’t feel real and certainly not fair. It all happened so quickly, and quite honestly, it’s been the worst year of my life. My world was turned upside down and I haven’t quite figured out how to turn it right side up again.

As the quote goes, “The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to.”

I won’t ever be the same. It’s impossible to describe unless someone really understands what it’s like to love an animal like a person. But I must rebuild. It’s not moving on, but life indeed must go on.

This week, I’m going on an adventure. The timing wasn’t purposeful, but it coincides with your anniversary. I will be chimp trekking that day in Uganda in your honor, wearing my Bella necklace with pride.

I love you forever. I miss you always. I will see you again one day.